Monday, January 02, 2017

Death, Danger, Diceyness

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On a frosty morning, somewhere in England, I get up. I text Les. HAs he got up? Its nice outside although cold. I put the frying pan on and put some sausages in and make a pot of tea.

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Sometime later, but not much, a red car pulls up. It is him, it is Les.

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I get in, make myself comfortable.

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So then where are we going Nack?

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I suggest you head to the M6 and head north.

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And so we do.

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Just keep going I say until you get to the Lake District junction and then turn right instead of left.

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For once he obeys the instructions. Ingelton we want.

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And before you know it we are here.

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I pay the twelve pounds for two adults and we get to park the car. Les wants a cup of tea so we head directly to the tea room. I’m also convinced that a cup of tea is the right thing to do.

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This however is throught with the impracticability that it is in fact closed! We turn back around and on the way back I smile. Death, Danger, Diceyness.

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We make our way towards the beginning of the trail.

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The sun warms as backs as we do so against the intensely dry chilly morning air. It is fresh and fills the lungs with delight of life.

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So this is it Les. I promise you something you’d enjoy as a day out.

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Is that enough waterfalls for you on one walk?

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Its a nice day for a walk, thankgod we put it off from yesterday.

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What a change what a difference.

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I’m considering getting a match out. Just considering.

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Afterall that would way a lot in my pockets, and the walk has only just begun.

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We find mushrooms first. By the riverside, the water trickling by, me I’m excited, I know something is coming up and fast.

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This is apparently the viewing point.

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For those with good eyesight or a camera with a zoom.

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A bit closer up, I put my serious waterfall hunter face on. Another for the collection.

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Without my mug though it looks like this.

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We climb upwards.onwards from where the water flows.

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And see more of it, water flowing.

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Wow these are good, this isn’t what I expected.

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And I wasn’t expecting this either. A tea room half way is marked on the map but this isn’t half way. Surely this isn’t half way.

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Either way it is most welcomed. So very, most welcomed.

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So this is it, this is heaven, blue skies, fresh air, and most importantly,

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A good Yorkshire brew.

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Now if there was snow here, DSC00658

then that would be out of this world.

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SO Les are you enjoying it so far? I suggest you don’t read the amp, you’ll ruin it for yourself.

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We finish the brews in real mugs ad walk on. For the Perrie De La Resistance is just ahead.

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And this is it. This is what everyone comes for. A magnificent face on the side of the hill tops, with water dribbling down it.

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We get a bit closer to enjoy its natural splendour

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I can always tell when Les is excited and happy.

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Me though, I’m never happy unless I can touch it, feel it, the water spitting on my face. I dare to go closer. If my balance was better I’d be right over there.

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From here there are steps up. Up and up.

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Never look back

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Always forward. You never know.

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What's around the corner, although really we should have. Its the top of the waterfall. Obviously.

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So Les the next tea room is just round the corner, in terms of countryside.

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Nack are you sure your reading this map right? I can’t even see a river?

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Well what about this one then?

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We reach the summit of the path. And then head down a track. I’m a lucky biy. I spot there in front of me a mobile iphone, in Pink.

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I ask the lady walking in front of us some distance away if it is hers, she says not but the rest of her family have gone off the beaten track and it could be one of there's. Well I’ll be in the car park in a couple of hours if it is.

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We walk on, we enjoy the beauty, it is so surreal, are we here, or am I just here in my head.

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Some approaches me, a girl, small and smiley, and asks, I understand you might have my phone. What colour is it I say. And hand it over, complete with a cracked screen.

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I can think of only one thing.

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Just like these pair. Where's the snow and ski lifts?

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We are pointed in a direction.

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Only to find the KLF are here again.

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A bit further along is the tea room and some toilets. Luckily the toilets aren't closed.

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The tea room however is.

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I enjoy the view while

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I enjoy a good suck of Capri Su Les has brought with him. No suger apparently.

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And so we continue the route. Into the woods.

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And to the sound of crashing water.

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Lots of it.

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A murky, spooky gorge we have ended up in.

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So different to the valley before.

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So very different.

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We follow the dog for surely he knows the way out of the wood.

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However, he just brings us to some more mushrooms.

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Les I can hear water again.

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It must be through this bit of spooky woodland.

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And then we come across a gate.

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Which leads us to this.

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See you are holding on Les.

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Oh crumbs!DSC00816

And there it is, the water, the spring of life.

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Quick smile before I drop it.

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And so we leave.

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One last selfie for the Waterfall hunter Collection.

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And that's it. No more waterfalls. So from here it is a long walk.

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Les, I could really do with a cup of tea.

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And at Ingelton that is what we head for.

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We view a real map here of where we have been. What we have seen.

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The tea comes,

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The tea comes twice!

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And finally our food comes too.

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So Les was it worth it?

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We munch, we slurp, we sit, aching. A nice life filled ache.

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But we must find the car. We must started our return journey.

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The sun is setting.

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My legs are wobbling.

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Thankgod for wheels.

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But it would be rude no to go the countryside way home, and so we do, watching the sun slowly go downwards.

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Blinding at times, but oh so wonderful to see.

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We hit the M6. And I relax.

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As near home I fancy fish and chips. I nod to Les that the fish and chiops shop across the road has not opened for some time. And that I know where there is another. In a lower class area. It should be good on those terms.

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And after a long long weight for my Haddock to be cooked, we are not disappointed. Infact why have I got such a big fish, why have I got so many chips.

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And in truth the meal beat me. There was just way too much Smile





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"Nowhere Near The End Of the Rainbow"
contains information that is non-accurate, made up and in some cases just down right lies. Anything in this blogg may be based on true fiction but to help dramatise it, some items may have been embellished. Some names are made up, others are not and any that are familar to yours just are.



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